A series of articles
by Brandon "Blankman" Cavanaugh.
To the Future
Okay, I’ve got this defensive coordinator thing
figured out. Forget Bo Pelini, forget all the hype you’ve heard,
Blankman is your man. Get this: Nebraska comes out and puts points
on the board, 3 or 7, it doesn’t matter. Then, we allow the
team, CUNNINGLY, I might add, to go down the field and score a TD
luring them into a false sense of security. Going into the locker
room at the half, seemingly dejected and frustrated, we burst forth
from the womb of Memorial Stadium and do smite our enemies into 2nd
half shut outs, thus ensuring an undefeated season and 6th national
Okay, okay, I’ll get semi-serious here. So,
you were expecting a 1995 Nebraska ass-kicking today, were you? 66-0,
does that sound about right? Well, as one of my all-time favorite
instructors, Gary Blackburn, would tell us after we hosed an entire
hard drive (not me), “That’s unfortunate.” It was
planned, not necessarily that it’d be 15-7 at the half, but
that Nebraska would get a decent lead (they did) and they would get
some of the young pups some reps (again, they did.)
I pondered, as I enjoyed the ride home from Lincoln,
what bandwagon I should hitch my star to. Would I be a Lordling or
a Dailey Devotee? Then it hit me like Demorrio Williams off of the
weak side, I couldn’t care less. That’s right, Blankmaniacs,
I don’t really give a third and long about who is the starting
quarterback against Penn State or Texas or Kansas State. All I care
about is that big, fat W in the most important column of all. So what
did The Blank One think of He Who Was Delivered From On High…er…the
East Coast, anyway? Joe Dailey, for a true freshman, is good. Very
good, in fact. He has a sweet touch on his passes. He makes the most
out of truly bad situations. He has a presence. He is a very good
quarterback and, from what I gather, human being as well. He did what
was asked of him and more. I believe I can say, unequivocally, no
less, that Mr. Dailey made about 78,000 new best friends today. Let’s
leave it at that and move on for now, shall we? (That’s me attempting
to shore up the wave of START DAILEY NOW’s)
The I-backs did their civic duty once more and gosh
darnit, we just knew one of them would run for 100, right? Again,
that’s unfortunate. Josh Davis ended the day with 13 carries
for 65 yards which is a solid day at the ballpark in which 3 backs
played. David “I Play Bass Not French” Horne had 10 carries
for 51 yards and looked particularly saucy on a few plays. The Rushing
Freak of the Day Title, however, goes to Mr. Dailey. Dailey had 8
rushes for 69 yards, so aside from the fumble in the end zone, not
too shabby for a true frosh.
Other side of the ball time as we rap about the Blackshirts.
Speaking of which, I was going into this game thinking the High Holy
Grail of Defense was attainable. That’s right, a shutout (momentary
pause for Sign of the Cross). The thing was, Travis Cox and the Gaggies,
get this, tried to score. “You insolent cur!”, I shrieked
at Mr. Cox. Okay, it probably came out closer to “Aw, no you
di’in’” and or “Step up off mah grill, dawg!”,
I honestly forget. Anyway, Utah State wasn’t about to bend over
and take it just yet, so Travis Cox leads them down to score making
it 7-6 Utah State. When the Huskers went in up 15-7 at the half, I
decided it was time for drastic measures for the second straight week.
That’s right, the Rally Cap®.
As the bill of my hat was turned to face the sun,
the Blackshirts shined once more. Specifically, the Defensive Freak
of the Day, Demorrio “Call Me Whatever You Want, I Still Mess
You Up, Sucka” Williams. Super Demorrio was all over Travis
Cox like Tom Osborne on a filibuster and I’ll just make the
statement right now so we can get it out of the way: Williams for
All-Big XII, at least. 238 yards total were drawn up on the board
and according to Ye Olde Goals of Footballing, that’s a solid
day at the ballpark. Also, I feel it necessary to alert you and yours
that Mr. Cox had about 110-120 yards passing after the first quarter.
He finished with 178, so he done got punk’d by Mr. Pelini who
probably will be all up in Demorrio’s face about not getting
7 sacks when he could’ve. I love that man, by the way. Which
one? You pick.
You’ve heard of “Stella Got Her Groove
Back”? I think I’d entitle this Sixth day of September,
“The Day Sandro Got His Dues Back”. BURN! Okay, no offense
to Sandro personally but come on, bud. When you go 1-3 one day and
miss a freaking EXTRA POINT the next week? That deserves the Patented
Yank© and was I ever happy to see #27 come into the game. David
“I’m Not Like That” Dyches went 4-4, plunked in
extra points when necessary, basically did his job. Sure, they were
mostly short kicks, but the point is: They were MADE. Ladies and Gentlemen,
I think we’ve found our kicker for the next four years.
So, positives, positives, where are the positives?
Here’s a few: Nebraska has itself two quarterbacks who can start
and play with the first string at least semi-well. That’s a
start. Also, Nebraska has itself a kicker who can, #1, complete extra
points and as an added bonus, notches the occasional field goal. Not
enough? How does 405 total yards sit in your craw? How about the fact
that the second half adjustments aren’t a fluke but a reality,
something we can rely on these days? Here’s another: Nebraska
has allowed 14 points TOTAL in its first two games. They’re
on the positive side of the turnover battle.
Yes, mistakes were made. Again, it wasn’t perfect.
There’s plenty of could’ve, even SHOULD’VES to go
around, but the mistakes can be reduced to a minimal if not eliminated
all together. Methinks things will get better now that PSU comes into
town. The Payback Tour continues and JoePa’s in the Scarlet
and Cream Sights now. There’s plenty to remember and plenty
to look forward to. Enjoy the week leading up to this one; it’s
gonna be fun under the lights. Oh and one last thing. Don’t
let the tweaks and misses of today hinder one very important fact
after today’s win: 2-0. That’s all you, me or anyone else
in the country needs to know. I can guarantee you Penn State, NC State,
Virginia, Purdue, etc. etc. wish they could say the same.
and your innovative referee taunts can be sent to Blankman71@cox.net
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