A series of articles by Brandon "Blankman" Cavanaugh.

Catching Up

Welcome and shalom, O’ Purveyor of Knowledge (or Nowledge depending on what mentally and verbally depleted Missouri fan you stumble upon today). Blankman here fresh off a month-long vacation from the written word here to start the new year a’fresh and just in the midst of one of the most, shall we say, interesting recruiting years in recent memory. A lot went on in this past month, after all. The win over M-S-Who in the Alamo Bowl, the coaching search went awry, the removal of all but three of the former staff and, as mentioned, the recruiting season that has gone from “uh oh” to “Not a bad first few weeks, Bill.” So let’s put the TV on mute for a moment as the Blank One riddles and rhymes his way through a month’s worth of Nebraska Cornhusker news.

- Head Coach Bill Callahan

I’m a Nebraska fan. Big shock, no? Here’s the thing though: even for those around the state, scratch that, the COUNTRY, that’s who I am. They see the white “N” on my cap and what I surround myself with in the office and they know that this guy has to have an opinion. While it’s cool to be asked what the latest and greatest is in Lincoln and know somewhat, it can be a little agitating to tell the Notre Dame fans just what I think of everything going on in Lincoln. So, as a public service to myself and to everyone curious (not to mention those that e-mailed me shortly after the fact), here is my take on one William Callahan.

So, I heard S.P. (Also known in this state and abroad as Public Enemy #1 for a variety of reasons) wanted a pro coach. It was the allure, the prestige, but of course, not to be denied was the bling bling, fo shizzle. So Steve goes out and finds himself, well let’s be honest, stumbles upon perhaps one of the best things to happen to him since “When I was at Pitt…” Callahan is the son of an irish policeman from Chicago. Let’s analyze that for a moment, shalst we? Irish eh? I, too, am Irish, so we’ve got that in common. Not bad. Son of a policeman, you say? Diciplined, wouldn’t you think? Spare the rod, spoil the child and all that. From Chicago? Big 10 country? Hello Mr. Callahan, I think we have ourselves a winner in the UNL Jackpot!

I like Coach Cal (as I have fondly named him). He strikes me as a guy who is very down to Earth, easy to get along with. Hell, the guy even invites over the media for some pizza and pop. Can the guy recruit? My goodness, this guy makes a normal situation look more appealing than Halle Barry in a red and green thong on Christmas. Sure, sure, I know what you’re gonna say. He ditched the option, our tradition and our heritage! True, Cal did come in and say point blank (snicker) that he would be installing the dreaded West Coach Offense (or MidWest Coast Offense) but Billy knows the name of the game is balance and that’s where his bread will be buttered. 1,000 yard runningbacks coupled with 1,500 yard quarterbacks and maybe a 1,000 yard receiver every now and again. I am quite anxious for the era to begin come March. Spring game, anyone?

- Coaching Staff Turnover

Now, while it was difficult to see Bo Pelini head south to the dreaded Sooners (which, according to Hortence in Cracked Elbow means we’ll lose by 70 to OU), I don’t necessarily think it’s the end of all things red and white. Did it suck to lose Bo? Absolutely it did. The guy’s a proven motivator, he gets love from the kids he teaches, he fights for them and they for him. The thing is? Bo made a few critical mistakes that one probably wouldn’t be making if they indeed wanted to keep a job, but that’s cool. I’m a big believer in everything in life happening for a reason. Not to downplay his addition to the OU staff, but I see Bo movin’ on up’ like George and Wheezy in a year or two. Back to his true love, of course, the NFL. I just happen to think it’s where he feels he needs to be.

As far as losing all of the assistants went, it was tough. Seeing all of the new guys that I had grown comfortable with ushered out the door wasn’t an easy pill to swallow. However, I will say this: It appears that Coach Cal has himself a plan and that is to make Nebraska an attractive alternative to the Miamis and the USCs of the world. Come to Nebraska and be part of a tradition dating back to before the LAST century started. Come to Nebraska and become legends. Come to Nebraska and be prepared for (and this is key, folks) The League. That’s right, baby. If you act now, you can get in on the ground floor of the Big Red Machine 2K4, a finely tuned piece of equipment ready to thresh, shred and annihilate any foe, ne’er-do-well or ragamuffin in your path. The additions have been carefully selected and the emphasis is clear: Recruiting. It is yet to be known whether or not water will be turned into wine, but I tend to lean towards it actually happening. Why? Because, when it’s all about the bling bling, you can’t afford it to go any other way.

- Recruiting

Recruiting’s a science that I tend to veer away from commenting until the lads put pen to paper, otherwise, I figure, you’re jumping the gun. I do intend to be at the Big Red Recruiting Dinner once more and will probably have a full write up, but this section isn’t so much about who has been obtained but how. Impressions are being made. Good ones, at that. Impressions that, perhaps, Frank couldn’t have made when you get down to the nitty gritty about it. The new staff sells Nebraska on three basic things, I believe: Family, Tradition and Potential.

Family in the sense that if you arrive in Lincoln, you are now a brother, a son and a compatriot. Forever, you will be known as a Cornhusker and that alone will connect you to people across the state and the globe. Tradition in the aspect of having your name placed next to that of Johnny the Jet, Mike Rozier, Eric Crouch. Tradition of the Tunnel Walk and the Sea of Red every Saturday. Potential in that, hey, you want to play in The League some day? We’re your scarlet and cream ticket. We get our games on TV more times in one year than some schools do in a decade. You know what they call all of that, folks? A win-win situation and personally? I like to win.

So, there’s a basic rundown on the happenings and happenstance inside the Great State of Nebraska for my birth month. Fear not, faithful Blankmaniac, because we are just getting started with the second year of Shooting Point Blank. After all, we’ve got signing day, the Recruiting Banquet, spring ball, the Spring Game, summer practices…but leave us not get ahead of ourselves. This tradition is something to be savored like a fine wine or an overpriced steak. Sit back and let the ideas flow through the crevices of your mind and leave you in a state of Big Red Bliss. I wouldn’t have it any other way, would you?

Questions, commentary and broken facemasks can be sent to [email protected]

===Brandon a.k.a. Blankman #71===

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